Sam Allardyce Claims He Invented The Shaka

by Chris Rivers

Sam Allardyce today slithered from gravy stained layer to announce that the shaka “wasn’t invented by whoever Paul Pogba thinks it was” and instead by himself.

The one-time England boss told High Press News that he was forced to speak out after “accidentally stumbling upon an Instagram story” that showed the Manchester United midfielder throwing a ‘hang loose’ sign.

“It’s a disgrace. I’ve seen other players using it in their celebrations too. Until they are performing consistently, I don’t think they have the right to do it.”

“I’ve only ever used it on two occasions. The moment I invented it, and again for a bit of banter when Sammy Lee asked why I’d signed Mario Jardel.”

“He [Paul Pogba] should concentrate on his football.”

The shaka actually originates from 1960’s surf culture, but can today be found on the highest stage of world football or infesting the Facebook feed of any millennial that’s spent a couple of weeks travelling Australia.

Big Sam was quick to dismiss any previous ‘history’ of the hand sign, assertively stating: “It’s all speculative. I invented it about 10 years ago after seeing Barrack Obama do it on TV.”

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