Premier League Youth Manager Unsure How to Molest His Young Stars Without Ruining His Career

by Mitch Murphy

An under 15’s youth manager at a prominent Premier League club has today told High Press News that, within the current political and social climate, he is unable to violently molest his young players without fear of ending up in jail.

The experienced manager has spent decades building up his reputation in the game while secretly going to town on multiple youth squads but now worries that his perfect little underworld is crashing down around him.

“Back in the 80’s it was a lot easier,” said the masked youth manager, peering out of the shadows underneath a bridge. “There weren’t any real avenues to report what was happening and pretty much all of it was swept under the rug. But these do-gooders have ruined everything. It’s political correctness gone mad.”

The anonymous manager pointed towards the recent Barry Bennell case as one of the reasons why he now lives his life in fear. Bennell, formally of Crewe Alexandra, was sentenced to 30 years after a host of brave former players came forward to expose his evil crimes.

“You see something like that [the Bennell case] and you can’t help but think ‘I’m not going to be able to diddle kids anymore’. What kind of life is that?”

“What you do in the privacy of a multi-million-pound Premier League training complex surrounded by hundreds of other employees should be your own business.”

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