Premier League Clubs Announce Wage Cut to Help the NHS in Hilarious April Fools Prank

by Mitch Murphy

Doctors, nurses and the already deceased were left in fits of laughter today as Premier League clubs across the country announced their players were set to take a 20% reduction in wages to fund a massive lifesaving war-chest for the NHS in a hilarious April Fools prank.

With the average wage of an established Premier League footballer coming in at approximately £70,000 per week, the ludicrous idea of a 20% reduction to save lives should have sent off alarm bells in the medical community as to the true nature of the gesture. However, the prank seems to have caught almost every doctor and nurse off guard.

“To be honest, we should have known it was a prank,” admitted one ICU doctor who had not slept for two days. “I can’t imagine what it would be like to live on an average of £56,000 a week so when you think about it of course it was an April Fools. But sometimes, when you spend your life surrounded by people dying, patients and colleagues, you’re susceptible to a cheeky April Fools prank such as this. They really got us. They got us good.”

Martin Glenn, the CEO of the Football Association, gave a brief yet giddy statement announcing: ‘If Patch Adams taught us anything it’s that laughter is far superior to a monthly amount of life saving cash.’

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